We're going to change the way you look at tour dates.
We're going to revamp your thinking about the routing for Kylie Minogue, transform your thoughts about the dates for Supertramp and carve you a new point of view when it comes to The Breeders, Charlatans UK and Bruce Cockburn.
The world is changing and we're changing with it. No longer are we going to list dates for Dave Davies and The Chieftains in the classic "city, state and venue" model first developed by Copernicus in 1543. It's a new dawn rising on a newer millennium and we're going to smash the mold and break all the rules. We'll list the dates for Galactic in order of the best venue snack concessions, the Atom & His Package schedule will be sorted by the number of groupies per stop, and the routings for Diana Krall and David Byrne will be displayed in the order of the most livable cities. Sorry, Fresno.
But that's not all.
With these changes comes a whole new way of comprehending the universe around us as we break the shackles and chains that have bound mankind to the simplistic listing of the primordial concert elements of who, when and where. We're talking extreme attitude adjustment concerning Fred J. Eaglesmith, severe behavior modification involving The Nylons and totally ruthless chronological immersion when it comes to Savatage and Bowzer & The Stingrays. It's going to be a revolution of Pavlovian proportions. Let the bells ring!
Yes, it's a new dawn for tour date analysis, a new beginning for listing the itineraries for Stars On Ice and Michael Brecker and a rebirth in the ways of examining the schedules for Mary Black, The Burns Sisters Band and OKGo. We're taking the tour-date business to new heights, we're putting the pedal to the metal and pushing the envelope of concert data networking as we step up to the next rung on the evolutionary ladder. We're changing the way the entire world thinks about date, city and venue, and we're doing it on a cosmic scale of epic proportions. Furthermore, we're... we're...
What's that? It's Saturday? Everybody is sleeping in or catching up on Christmas shopping? No one has the time for another silly rant about how tour dates, like the ones for Luther Vandross or Stuttering John & Friends, are the most important reason for being alive?
Oh, well... Never mind.