In a rental car, somewhere in the southwest...
"Okay, Mudder, I give up. Why are we driving down a dirt road in the middle of the desert?"
"There's been a recent rash of concert circles, complex patterns drawn on the desert floor describing the routings for Britney Spears, Paco de Lucia and Modest Mouse. So far, modern science has not come up with an explanation, but I have a hunch it's the EBAs."
"EBAs, Mudder?"
"Extraterrestrial Booking Agents."
"Gimme a break, Mudder. I saw a news report where two unemployed oil workers from Bakersfield claimed credit for the circles. They said they created them by dragging an empty keg of Bud through the desert. That's hardly proof of EBAs."
"Those oil workers may have done a few concert circles, but that doesn't explain the rain of green frogs when Club 80's The Flashback Tour was announced, or the reports of Eddie Vedder's face appearing on refrigerators and other household appliances throughout San Francisco the day Pearl Jam tickets went on sale."
"Have you been meeting with the Bong Smoking Man again?"
"Laugh all you want, Scullery. Just yesterday, fans knew about the Brian Wilson Pet Sounds tour, even before the Ticketmaster clerks. How do you explain that?"
"Oh, I don't know, Mudder. Gossip? Postings on the Internet? I still don't see how this ties in with your theory of space agents."
"Of all the various professions within the concert industry, does anyone really know what an agent does? A job title like 'manager' or 'promoter' is self explanatory, but it's the agent who is the silent integer in the equation. There are some people who believe alien space agents visited the Earth thousands of years ago and have recently returned, not only to book shows for Bad Religion and Queensryche, but also to collect on commissions from events that date back to the Mayans and the Toltecs."
Hogwash. Agents are like anyone else, Mudder."
"Then how do you explain this?"
"Why, it's a photo of William Shatner."
"Yes, and he's hanging out with Ben Folds Five and Fishbone."
"Incredible! The agent that arranged this photo shoot. . ."
"Must have extraordinary persuasive powers beyond that of ordinary mortal man. A true EBA."
"You mean. . .?"
"That's right, Scullery. This could be big, really big."